August 1, 2011

Excuses, excuses...I need a solution!

I am...tired.

Yesterday we drove home from our vacation in North Carolina, and were suddenly faced with reality all over again. An email about mid-year reviews right before I went up to bed got me thinking about work, which I hadn't done in almost a week. And once my brain got going, it didn't want to stop. So neither did I, until well after midnight, when I finally drifted off into a restless, nightmare-ish sleep.

So I am tired today.

Zoe started in a new class at school today. Yesterday, she was super-excited for her class. Tonight, she was a disaster area, all mixed up and befuddled over the change in her routine. It's 8:56 and I only now think she might finally go to sleep.

I had a busy day at work. My responsibilities there are shifting towards project management, and it's like a whole new world. Today I had got bogged down in the weeds of a few processes, staring blankly at reports while my sleepy brain struggled to understand bar graphs. Tonight, I am a disaster area, all mixed up and befuddled over the change to my routine.

I had big plans for this week, you know? Return to the work routine, return to the work-out and writing routine that I love so much.

And that I am finally seated in front of my computer, there is nothing to write. I've gotten a couple more form rejections (man, what I wouldn't give for at least ONE personal note from an agent saying, "Well, it wasn't bad, but..."), and at this point I'm not sure if I should continue querying, continue working on part two of the little trilogy I've planned out so carefully, or if I should switch gears and work on the MUCH more serious story that has lived in my brain for over two years now...the one I stare and stare at and never get ANYWHERE. Or if I should quit writing entirely.

Nah. I won't do that.

It's just that I'm tired. Tonight.

So, I think what I need is some motivation. A challenge.

As it turns out, I know just the thing.

There's this amazing school for severely disabled children here in Charleston called Pattison's Academy, and they're currently running a fall campaign called the Challenge for Change. The children at the school face challenges beyond what most of us could ever imagine, and they work hard every day to change their lives for the better. So the idea is to find something you can do to change your own life for the better, and let people sponsor you (but really the school) to do it. So, I am running my own challenge, starting tomorrow night. It's called 30 Days of Writing for Change, and I hope to raise at least $500 for this amazing cause. Let's see if I can pull this one off!!!

So starting tomorrow night, I pledge to write at least an average of 1000 words daily for the next 30 days. I don't care WHAT I write, I just have to write something. So...a whole new synopsis to send to agents since clearly my old one isn't working? Counts. Bits and pieces of Book 2? Counts. My random other sad story that just...won't...come...out? Totally, completely counts.

Random babbling blog posts? Counts.

Wish me luck - I think I'm gonna need it.

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